The League of Unusual Denizens by Mark Cain
Author:Mark Cain [Cain, Mark]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2020-02-12T23:00:00+00:00
Chapter 16
The Naughtibus had to wait before getting a slip at the dock of Hindu Nirvana. Apparently, passengers and crew were not the only ones cruising Chaos, and the afterlife of the Hindus was a popular destination for what they learned was a thriving tourism industry.
The gang was assembled near the shipâs exit, waiting for an âall ashore thatâs going ashoreâ announcement from the bridge. Steve looked puzzled. âWhat I canât understand is why tooling around in an area that messes with your brain, the way Chaos does, would be popular with anyone. Who would possibly want to do that?â
âPoliticians,â Dorla remarked. âThey seem to thrive on Chaos.â
âWell, okay, Iâll give you that. But who else?â
âWedding planners,â Flo ventured. âMy wager is on wedding planners.â
Steve laughed. âOkay. Who else? Kindergarten teachers? Dormitory RAs? Canât think of any others.â
âSeriously,â Dorla said, âthose who started existence as mortals for the most part donât have the wherewithal to cruise Chaos. By the time youâre capable of such a journey, youâre dead and usually consigned to a Heaven or Hell, one of the Nirvanas, and so forth. Dweebils, not having their own religion, are a notable exception, of course.â
âOf course,â Steve said. âBut who does have the ability to travel through Pandemonium?â
âPeople such as you, for one. From what Lord Doofa has told me, saints and other heavenly representatives, angels and devils have always had access. And then there are gods and demigods.â
âYou mean like Odin?â Bik said breathlessly. Being a creature from Norse mythology, the young fire giant was a big Odin fan.
âIâve heard of Odin traveling through Chaos, yes. Lots of the old gods. Why, just before we left, someone told me Zeus, Quetzalcoatl and Osiris were planning a backpacking trip here.â
Steveâs lips curled, as if heâd just eaten spoiled food. âI think Iâd rather hit Yellowstone.â
âThereâs no accounting for taste, dear,â Flo said.
The Naughtibus, which had not moved in an hour, started up again, turned to port and cozied up to the dock. âAll ashore thatâs going ashore!â Lennard called over the PA system.
As Dorla waited for the doors to open, she felt a sense of urgency. The tear was getting worse by the minute, or eon, and if they could not get their supplies in Hindu Nirvana, she was uncertain what they would do. Was there another place to try? She had heard of Klmpfh-iana, the afterlife of all cephalopods, but she did not know where it abutted Chaos. There was also a shamanistic afterlife, somewhere. Many people of different Earth cultures were there, but they tended not to be technologically advanced. Even if the Naughtibus could travel to those places, Dorla feared that, as with Jain Nirvana, the afterlife of shamans and Klmpfh-iana would not have what they needed.
Dorla took a deep, calming breath. Hindu Nirvana was their best bet. She grabbed both ears and tugged on them; it was the dweebil version of crossing fingers.
Yeoman Hal opened the exit for them, and they piled onto the pier.
Hindu Nirvana was a bustling place.
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